It’s summertime again in America. Today, more men and women will go to the fair than ever before in our country’s history. With hundreds of new fair foods more than the record highs of 2013, near 2,000 families today will buy something deep-fried and sugary, more than at any time in the past four years. This afternoon 6,500 young men and women will try a new kind of never before tasted order of nachos there, and with interest in nachos more than double what it was just four years ago, they can look forward with confidence to a nacho filled future. It’s summertime in America, and with the crazy new nacho offerings from the Wisconsin State Fair, our country is prouder and stronger and better. After checking out this year's sampling of nachos, why would we ever want to return to the nacho free past we were less than four short years ago? Let’s examine this year’s offerings.
Cinnamon and sugar nacho chips topped with apple pie filling, caramel, whipped cream and walnuts. At Jayme's Chipstix.
A good start, both in general and alphabetically, with some Apple Pie Nachos, until Aardvark Nachos that is. Not that I’d recommend STARTING with these if you plan on having an order of nachos for dinner, but what better way to finish your nacho meal than with a tasty dessert of also nachos! You could also have some nachos as an appetizer as well, but that is up to you.
Saz's BBQ pulled pork topped with nacho cheese, jalapenos, onions, tomatoes, and cilantro. At Saz's Miller High Life Pavilion.
You know that when BBQ Pulled Pork Nachos are one of the least interesting orders of nachos served at a location there must be some pretty stiff, and delicious, competition. And baby, there is QUITE the competition this year. I'm sure these are great, but you really need to up your game when playing against nachos with toppings that no restaurant on earth would sell normally.
Fresh cut tortilla chips with BBQ rib meat, cheddar cheese, jalapenos, refried beans, scallions and black olives. At Pitch's BBQ & Miss Katie's Diner.
Along the same lines as the above BBQ Pork Nachos, just regular ol’ BBQ nachos aren’t going to cut it here, even if they are made with BBQ rib meat. It’s like the quarterback for the Wisconsin Badgers going up against the quarterback for the Green Bay Packers. Sure, everyone is cheering for the hometown kid, who is perfectly fine, but they don’t stand a chance against Brett Farve.
Classic, crispy nachos topped off with buffalo chicken. At Slim's PBR Park.
There is a tear in my eye when I say it, but there are at least 10 nachos I would try here before I tried these Buffalo Chicken Nachos. Those are words I have never written before in my life, and probably never will again, but I’ve said it now, and I can’t take it back. I can only hope that Buffalo Chicken Nachos will someday forgive me...
Hold the queso and bring on the sweetness with Chocomela Nachos, our scrumptious dessert nachos! Our homemade cinnamon sugar tortilla chips are made to delightfully dip in our salted caramel and milk chocolate gelato classics. Topped off with whipped cream sweet chocolate coating, and a salty peanut sauce with peanut pieces. At La Coppa Artisan Gelato.
Now Apple Pie Nachos are well and good for dessert nachos and all, but Chocomela is the way to go! Have you ever even heard of Chocomela? I have no idea what it is, but it’s description weaves a web of enticement that hands the Apple Pie Nachos description a thesaurus in sadness. I’ve eaten an apple pie before, but these I can taste from just the description alone. You know where you’ll find me having dessert.
Think eating bugs is gross? Think again! Insects are good for the environment and for you. Cricket nachos have all the flavor of regular nachos but are high in protein and gluten free! Crickets are a sustainable protein that require less water to grow, providing an eco-friendly way of eating. Be proud to say, "I Eat Bugs!" At All Things Jerky.
This is it folks, the pièce de résistance, Cricket Nachos. The description doesn’t explain whether the Cricket Nachos are replacing the chips with crickets or they’re just nachos that happen to have crickets on top of them, but either way, the name sells you on them in a second, or turns you off them in a second if eating bugs is not your bag. Would I like more explanation as to what the deal with these is? Sure, but the name alone is going to get you in the door of “All Things Jerky”, and once you see how the nachos are made I’m sure you’ll get some. Or they just made these to get you in the door to sell you all their other jerky wares with the knowledge that only a few brave souls will actually get these. Who can say, but I would easily travel from a state away to give these a try.
Tortilla chips served with a cheese sauce. Each of these vendors serves their own version of this traditional, Tex-Mex snack. At 3B Corn Dogs, Adeline's Corn, Beer & Pizza Wagon, Benno's Leinie Lodge, Charlie's Great Food, Charlie's Pizza, Derynda's Dairy Lane, El Vagabond, Fiesta Grill, Jack's French Fries, L&M Concessions, Mexican Grill, Miller Lite Sports Bar & Grill, Sausage Haus North, Sausage Haus West, Tavern at the Park, and Uncle Sal's Bistro.
As the saying goes, “When you come at the King, you best not miss.” You don’t come to a fair serving all kinds of nachos never before seen on planet earth if you can’t step up to meet them, and believe me, just calling your food “Nachos” is not going to cut it. If you come to the fair and only get these, you might as well have just stayed home.
Tortilla chips topped with a variety of toppings such as beef, shredded cheese, tomatoes, black olives, etc. Each of these vendors offers their own version of Nachos Grande. At Adeline's Corn, El Vagabond and Sausage Haus North.
This is slightly better than just “Nachos”, but not much, in that these would be the second to last order of nachos I would get here. Anywhere else a Nachos Grande would be a definite buy, but here they’ve got to wow me, and just a “Grande” isn’t going to wow someone walking through the gates of the Wisconsin State Fairgrounds. You can do better Nacho Grande.
Homemade chips topped with Irish beef and bleu cheese dressing. At Slim McGinn's Irish Pub.
I don’t know who Shannon is, but a beef and bleu cheese dressing nachos does sound pretty good. Is Shannon a lady who makes tasty nachos? Are these nachos based out of Shannon Ireland since they’re served at Slim McGinn’s Irish Pub? Many questions, very few answers, but I’m always up for a Shannon who loves making nachos!
These nachos are given a kick with our delicious southwest seasoned chicken, which is sure to make your mouth water. At Slim's PBR Park.
Is a Southwest Chicken related closer to a BBQ Chicken or a Buffalo Chicken, or something else entirely? I don’t know! Sadly since I won’t be able to attend the fair I’ll never know either, but Southwest Chicken with the above description just isn’t selling me enough compared to Cricket Nachos.
Thinly-sliced, deep-fried, seasoned potato chips topped with cheese sauce, Irish beef, and onions with a side of ranch dressing. At Slim McGinn's Irish Pub.
At Slim McGuinn’s Irish Pub you have the choice between these or the Shannon Nachos from above. While those appear to be closer to your traditional nachos, what we have here are your more standard Irish Nachos, and oddly enough the only Irish Nachos at the entire fair! Maybe it’s not that odd, only 1 out of 14 nachos being potato chip based? Sure, why not.
The delicious taste of nachos grande but with a healthy, turkey meat. At Wisconsin Poultry Egg Products.
“The delicious taste of nachos grande but with a healthy, turkey meat.” Subtlety much? What kind of propaganda from “Big Turkey” is this? But truthfully, I have never had or seen turkey nachos before so these might be interesting, but if you’re going to make Turkey Nachos I feel like you might as well just go all in and make Thanksgiving Nachos. Throw on some mashed potatoes, stuffing, sliced up green beans, add gravy, now we’re talking. I really want some of these Thanksgiving Nachos that I just made up now...
Chips topped with ground beef, lettuce, tomatoes, salsa, cheese, jalapenos, and sour cream. At Tavern at the Park.
Again, same issue with these here as with the “Nachos” and “Nachos Grande”. The only way you could make “Ultimate Nachos” truly “Ultimate” would be to serve them in a collectable frisbee, which would be pretty damn awesome. A quick google shows that serving food in a frisbee is a thing that exists, so get on that Tavern at the Park!
A complete southern fried chicken dinner in nacho form! Totally "chipless" nachos using deep-fried chicken cracklings as its base! Smothered with Wisconsin cheddar & jack, mashed potatoes, Water Street Brewery amber beer-marinated and house-smoked pulled chicken with special spice rub. Topped with homemade corn salsa, house-pickled jalapenos and sweet peppers. At Water Street Brewery.
Now this is how you describe an order of nachos you want to move! Water Street Brewery obviously took the same creative writing class as La Coppa Artisan Gelato and their Chocomela Nachos to write this up, and let me tell you that I am sold! Plus the fact that the chips are just deep-fried chicken cracklings is something Taco Bell will I’m sure try after the success of the all chicken taco Naked Taco, and I say bring it on!
The Wisconsin State Fair runs from August 3rd to 13th, so if you want to try all of these you’ll definitely have to try multiple orders a day. Some aspiring entity there should work up a nacho passport to stamp at each of these location when one of these are consumed, a full book of which would result in fabulous awards and prizes! I have no idea what these would be, but if the Wisconsin State Fair would like to hire someone to think up such fabulous prizes and awards I know someone who would be very interested in talking with them...