What is an order of nachos worth to you? $1 of an order of Taco Bell Triple Layer Nachos? $6 for an order of concession nachos at your local movie theater? $12 for an order of nachos at your favorite sit down Mexican place? What about a single order of nachos for $120? Well, if that’s not out of your budget, 7908 Aspen in Aspen, Colorado has $90 or $120 nachos just for you! Also, you obviously have a bunch of expendable income, so how about checking out the Nachonomics store?
Read MoreChip of News: Spontaneous Chip Combustion
We all remember the legendary story of Mary Reeser, the 67 year old Florida woman who is the most well known victim of Spontaneous Human Combustion, or SHC. Not much is known about the reason why a human body might for no reason just burst into flames, but the condition was first proposed in 1746, meaning humans have been living in fear of it for nigh on 300 years. As little as there is known about SHC though, there is even less known about SCC, also known as Spontaneous Chip Combustion.
Recently the fire department of Austin Texas had an encounter with tortilla chips of an extraordinary sort. Apparently there were some boxes of tortilla chips outside a factory that spontaneously exploded into fire for no discernible reason! If that wasn’t creepy enough, a mere three days later ANOTHER bunch of tortilla chips exploded into flames outside the very same factory! Now either this factory is the testing grounds of a new brand of weaponized chips so spicy that the flames manifest themselves into reality, or there is something truly supernatural going on...
You can read the details directly from the fire department here, and let them be a warning to you. Just because we can make chips that will metaphorically catch fire in your mouth, doesn’t mean that they might not also literally catch fire in your mouth as well. We are now 67 years since the death of Mary Reeser, who has now been dead for as long as she was alive, and we still have no answer to what happened to her. I imagine that if we could go back and examine that crime scene, maybe there would be a stray tortilla chip or two around the heap of ashes that she had once been that might give an idea...
Essay: Don’t Like Cilantro? You’re A Genetic Monstrosity
Coriander. Chinese Parsley. The Devil’s Dill. God’s Basil. Oregano’s Mustard Grass Cardamom. No matter the name it goes by, when it comes to nachos there is no more divisive a topping than the famous/infamous CILANTRO. One could argue that lettuce (acceptable in some nacho situations) or black olives (never to be used due to tasting like an old ashtray) are controversial as well, but as you can see I just resolved those arguments. No, cilantro, an herb disliked by even the great Julia Child herself, is a problem not quite so easily resolved.
Read MoreReview: Taqueria Diana
Fresh Tortilla Chips, Cheese, Black Beans, Salsa, Carnitas, Guacamole, Crema
New York City. The Big Apple. The City of Dreams. The Capital of the World. The City So Nice, They Named it Twice. The Center of The Universe. The City That Never Sleeps. The Empire City. The Five Boroughs. Fun City. Gotham. The Melting Pot. Metropolis. New Amsterdam. The Modern Gomorrah. Those are all the names Wikipedia informed me that New York City is known by, but what Wikipedia doesn’t tell you is that there are also restaurants that sell nachos there. I wouldn’t know though, because when I visited I didn’t get any.
Read MoreHappy 4th of Juleezy!
4th of Juleezy, 4th of Juleezy, how oh how can I make you more cheesy? Why, by making up the word "Juleezy" in order to rhyme with "Cheesy" for one. Another way would be to make up some PATRIOTIC NACHOS: A.K.A. PATRIOTIC BBQ GRILLING NACHOS USA USA, the recipe for which is available at the link previous, or featured along with 13 other delicious recipes in Recipes from the Nachonomicon. At this point if you're reading this and in desperate need for nacho goodness for your BBQ this afternoon you're going to have to go with the linked version because there's no way you can order the book and have it arrive to you on time, but if you found it so delicious in retrospect you felt like buying the book, you'd get no complaints from me! And remember, don't go blowing your hand off with some fireworks, because it's a lot harder to eat nachos with a hook.